I Think I Found My Smile!

Yes go on, make the jokes...it was down the back of the sofa!

You may well want to mark this date down in the calendar too, you see this entry in FBM is not any kind of rant or moan!

Things are changing here at Yam Towers...for the better too. Mentally there is a far brighter outlook, I am feeling a lot more positive about myself, my confidence and self esteem have boosted by tenfold..no a thousandfold and I catch myself smiling so much all the time, I just so very happy all the time!

People around me are noticing the difference in me too...saying that I carry myself totally different, I interact with people more, with enthusiasm too. I still feel a bit nervous and panicky about being around people but it feels more that if they stare at me it's their problem and not mine.

Sure, being on antidepressants has been a help making things feel better, but I have also lost weight and in just under a year I have lost over 10" on my waistline which has been great as weight has been a great issue for me for a long time.

I have had a great support network of really nice people who have been there for me despite being a miserable git a lot. I'm not going to name names but there was one person in particular who helped me more than they will ever realise, they made me realise that I am worth something, that I'm not a piece of scum like I felt I was. Well, you know who you are...and if you read this blog entry (I hope you do) I thank you from the very bottom of my heart for saving me from the freefall I was in mentally, I owe you a drink!

So yeah...good times ahead, maybe even slimmer times, but the future's bright...for once.