What a fucking moron...

I recently found out my jackass of a father has a Facebook and out of curiosity I thought I'd have a look and see what he had to say for himself.

He described himself as a "Professional Poacher since 1955" and I though I'd expand on this a little.

He is basically nothing but an abuser, a thief and a bully. He has said on more than one occasion "if its not nailed down it's mine" and it's pretty much true...he used to force me to go out at night as a very young child while he went and stole things from various places. He had been arrested for injuring an elderly lady in a robbery (who later died) and also a smash and grab robbery stealing a large amount of fireworks from a hardware store among other things (the sad thing was that the fireworks were dumped on a bonfire - I kid you not - in our back garden in Gosport!).

Poacher? My mom once commented that "he couldn't poach a fucking egg, let alone be a poacher"!

So my father says he is a "professional poacher since 1955"....I guess he didn't put "thieving abusive asshole since birth" as it would lose him friends...and the truth hurts.

Humble apologies...

This is just a quick note, if it feels like I have ignored or forgotten you, it is NOT the case.

I have just recently moved 300 miles to live with the love and light of my life, and as well as sorting the usual change of address stuff (as you do) I've had a few issues with the medical professionals here (me having issues with medical things...well there's a surprise!!!) so despite the few pictures and comments here and there I've been a tad busy to say the least.

So...please don't think I've forgotten you, or that I'm ignoring you...thank-you for reading this message and I hope that normal service will be resumed shortly.

The light of my life.

Most people will know me as this miserable git, but over the last several weeks things have happened, my life is coloured for the better. I feel more confident in myself, I have a smile on my face pretty much all the time and things are pretty much turning out for the better....I'm actually happy...REALLY happy.

Why could this be?

Simple, I'm in love.

The light of my life is Krystie Lennon-May, an amazing lady I have known for a while...and we have always had feelings for each other, but I had always backed away because she was in a relationship, it's the way it should be...be things changed.

She told me she was polyamorus.

This put a totally new slant on things, especially as her husband is perfectly happy with the situation too....so now, I am in a relationship with someone who I really really love, and someone who really loves me too.

Sure this relationship is not exactly conventional, but who is to say what is the norm? I personally do not care what people think, I am happy, Krystie is happy and we are not hurting anyone...it works for us and that is all that matters.

So yeah...good times...many many good times :)

Foreseen circumstances...

Today I got second letter from the hospital in regards to "unforeseen circumstances".

Last week, I received a letter from the cardiology department that due to "unforseen circumstances" my hospital appointment had been postponed for a week. This is obviously a FORESEEN circumstance though as they were able to tell me in advance that my appointment had been pushed back a week.

Today, another letter...from the SAME DEPARTMENT! This time to tell me another appointment with the same cardiac consultant had been postponed a further 10 days.

So, both appointments postponed, why couldn't they have done this all in one letter?


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Why Chocolate Eggs???

Well, Easter is upon us again, and we celebrate by eating chocolate representations of unfertilised embryos...

I have always wondered...why exactly have people celebrated by getting people chocolate eggs?

I asked this question recently and someone said to me about the fact that chicks and lambs are kind of associated because of rebirth, which I can understand...but where do rabbits and chocolate eggs come in?

So, what happened? Was it some kind of magic trick by Jesus? Was his resurrection introduced by him exploding out of a chocolate egg that was laid by a rabbit? Or when he returned, did he wow audiences by creating a rabbit that crapped out egg-shaped chocolate turds? Or did he get his revenge by going up to kids and turning their pet rabbits into chocolate?

Can anyone answer this for me?

Unbeatable...

I've been in hospital for the worst part of a week.

Most people who know me will be aware that I've got a bit of a dodgy heart with rapid and irregular pulse. It put me in hospital last year when I fell ill with rota virus.

This time, I'm hoping things will be a little different. I had a minor procedure that scars the heart to prevent the irregular beating. So far it has been deemed a success, although they have said they do not think it will be a permanent fix, and still think I will need a pacemaker at some stage.

But for now, I feel.....good.

2011 And All That Jazz

Well this year has be amazing...not.  I've been going over the things that have happened to me and to be honest it has been pretty shit.

I almost died, I've been hospitalized too many times, had constant hospital appointments, learnt that my sister is nothing but a 2 faced bitch, the family pretty much fell apart and I broke up with my girlfriend (my decision).  It has been an annus horriblus to say the least...but despite all this, several good things have happened too...I went out of my comfort zone and took a trip out to London, and despite being ill while I was there I had a good time.  I have made some good friends...and also made some people very close to me smile.

So...with that kind of year over, what does 2012 hold?  Of course nobody really knows, although I know that I have trip to London in January and there are a few movies I'm looking forward to...and I'm sure a few Marmite  related things will be coming my way too!

Well, dear readers...wether 2011 has been a good or a bad one for you, I hope that 2012 is a good one for you, and that you and everyone important to you are happy, safe and well.

Happy Birthday @HauntedRockCake !

My dear friend Sandra celebrates her 50th birthday today, and I wanted to to wish her many happy returns...

If you are on Twitter, please wish @HauntedRockCake a happy birthday, I am sure all the wishes will make her smile!!!

An Email To The Bus Company...PART 2

To my surprise, I actually got a reply back from Stagecoach bus TODAY!!  At their customer service is quicker than their buses, although that would not be difficult...here is what they said:

Good Afternoon Mr May 

Thank you for your email and I am sorry to read that you are unhappy with the service you have received from us. 

Your email has been passed to Colin Ashcroft, Operations Manager for Basingstoke, who will come back to you as soon as possible but certainly within a week. If there is a need to do an investigation into your comments, they will let you know how long this will take. 

Please find a link to our Code of Practice for Customer Suggestions and Complaints below, which outlines our commitment to handling your feedback in a prompt and professional manner. 

Kind regards 

Rob Kerr 
Customer Services Supervisor
______________________________________________________ 
Stagecoach South Customer Services Team 
Stagecoach South  ‌  The Bus Station  ‌  Southgate  ‌  CHICHESTER  ‌  West Sussex  ‌  PO19 8DG 
Telephone:  0845 121 0190 ‌   Fax:  01243 528743 ‌   
Email: enquiries.south@stagecoachbus.com   Web:  www.stagecoachbus.com/south 
  
Our opening hours are: 
Monday - Friday 0700-1900 |   Saturday 0800-1800   |   Sunday 0900-1300 
  
Attached is a link to our company's complaints procedure on the website for your reference. 
www.stagecoachbus.com/codeofpractice.aspx 
  
Stagecoach (South) Ltd.‌ Registered in England & Wales No. 1673542 
Registered address:  Daw Bank, Stockport, SK3 0DU 


So, my thoughts have been passed onto the Operations Manager for Basingstoke and apparently will get a reply within a week...well, we shall see.

More on this as I get it.

An email to the bus company...

I have just written the following email to Stagecoach Bus complaining about their services (hey, there's a surprise huh?) and I thought that you might like a read.

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to complain about the state of the bus service in my area.

I reside in Tadley, just outside Basingstoke and due to disability I am unable to drive, so when I need to get into town or the hospital (which is quite regular) I am reliant on the bus service (I would order a taxi, but it is too expensive for someone on benefits, although the way the prices keep increasing it will soon be about the same price) to get me there, but the problem is I cannot rely on the buses to be there on time.

If I have a hospital appointment, I need to make sure I'm at the bus stop an hour or more earlier (for a 15-20 minute journey) then my appointment to guarantee that I can get a bus there on time, and on more than one occasion it has been a case that I have waited over an hour for the bus to arrive and had to reschedule appointments.  I have asked at the bus station in the information desk about this and they say it was a day with not enough staff, but this must be the case a lot as it this almost an every day occurrence.

Then there is the case of multiple buses seemingly "vanishing".  This morning while waiting for the bus (over 40 minutes yet again) 3 Jazz 2 buses went up.....but only after the 3rd one did an actual bus arrive at our bus stop.  What is happening to all these buses?  If they are breaking down surely you should get better mechanics?

I don't expect the bus to be there at the exact time specified (we don't actually have a time specified for the bust stop, but 3-4 previous, which I take into account), with things like several passengers getting on a bus, or heavy traffic, but waiting 40 minutes or longer for a bus that is supposed to arrive every 20 minutes is an unacceptable way for this service to be run.

I was wondering if you could give an explanation for how bad the service is in my area.

I look forward to your reply.

Regards

Mr. S.B.May

I would love to hear what they have got to say for themselves, but I doubt they will reply...I mean they don't want to listen to me, I am a mere customer.  I'll keep you posted with any replies I get.

Pedigree Adoption Drive...Take Ripley For A Walk!

Steve Jobs RIP

This has to be one of the saddest things to see and such a huge shock as such.

Jobs was the founder and former CEO of Apple, and also part of Pixar, without him there would be so many things we would miss out on.

Sure, either you loved or loathed Apple, bit regardless there was no denying how much it revolutionised the way people did things.

Good night Mr Jobs, you will be missed by many, but at least you are no longer in pain.



R.I.P. STEVE JOBS 1955-2011

If it ain't broke...

What is it with websites/software producers/whatever "improving" their software constantly...so much so that it actually makes it worse?

The latest culprit of this annoying little trend is Facebook, who have altered their news feed so it is completely crazy and some of the options that people used have totally vanished, and there have been some subtle tweeks to home pages and ways you respond.

Facebook, when will you learn?  Did you check to see if people actually wanted these changes?  Did you consider doing this as an optional thing?  No, of course you didn't...simple fact is you know it all don't you?

Actually, no...you are a bunch of fucking morons.

You see, people were fairly happy how it was beforehand...had people said to you "what we really need to make this perfect is for you to fuck up the timeline so it a)isn't in chronolgical order and b)a complete fucking mess"?  Somehow I think not.

Seriously Facebook...it is ain't broke...don't fix it....because you are almost always guaranteed to fuck it up big time.

The theory of talking behind someone's back.

REGULAR READERS PLEASE READ:  My humble apologies for the following post, I appear to be having communication issues with some family...please disregard, normal service shall resume shortly.)



I have been having some interesting comments from my beloved sister Amy of late...

Not only am I nothing but "an evil cunt" but I apparently need to grow a set and say things behind her back, I need to say it face to face.

I have never said anything about you behind your back that I wouldn't say to your face...and if I was saying something behind your back, would I have put it somewhere where I know you can access and know you can read (you can read, right?), and all my social networks are public for all to see, I do not see the point in hiding something like that, and I have always believed honesty is the best policy.

Speaking of honesty....

You have been nothing but a lying conniving little bitch, you don't seem to be happy unless everyone is miserable and you are the centre of attention...you are nothing but a fucking hypocrite saying everything is all me me me...but destroying the family unit has made you happy, I really hope you are pleased with what you have done and the ensuing repercussions of what has been said and done.

So there you, a nice slice of honesty for you there, dear sister.

Thank-you and fuck you bitch.

P.S.  If you follow Amy Eccott on Facebook, could you please please please make sure she gets this, I want her to see this is not behind her back and is open and honest.

Orange...Service With A Spit.

HRC's phone (a nice shiny Motorola Atrix) has been playing up the last few days where sending any type of text message was verging on the impossible and as this is the second model she has had this issue with since May she wanted to get a different model phone as she did not want this to occur again.

We trundled off to the local Orange store, the sales assistant tried a few things and found that he was replicating the issue and said that there was nothing he could do, we had to call up the customer care line for details....they said there was nothing they could do in the store which I thought was a touch odd as I'm also an Orange customer and in-store they have helped me with issues with my iPhone 4 no problem....nonetheless we thanked him for his time and went outside to make a phone call.

Orange support immediately said that they would replace the faulty phone with the same model (it will arrive here tomorrow by courier) and when HRC asked if she could have a totally different phone as she was unhappy she was told no as this model could work fine...but that was said about the previous one as well!!

To top it all off she was then informed that if this third phone breaks down in the same amount of time (so far the average lifespan of an Atrix in HRC's hands is approximately 2 months) then they will replace her phone with one of THEIR choosing which could be older or newer than the phone she has currently!!

Orange, this is not customer service...this is basically the equivalent of you saying "Yes, you pay your money...but we don't give a flying fuck...want us to be reasonable?  Kiss our collective asses".  Shame on you.

Amy Winehouse RIP

I have been saddened by the news of the passing of Amy Winehouse.

But as much as this is sad news, it was really inevitable....she was so bad with drink and drugs, she was a ticking time bomb going to explode at any time.  In some ways her passing means that she will not be haunted by these demons anymore.

So, let us remember the music, she was a legend...and will be sadly missed

Amy Winehouse 1983-2011 RIP

Family Feud...great fun to play at home!!

I have always believed that family matters...you know they are in trouble, you put your own issues aside and then help wherever you can....even against other members of family.

Yes, that is the current situation....3 members of the family have gone out of their way to destroy the family with utter bullshit.  I was was asked help them too and I refused to do...I will not help people being deliberately malicious because they do not like someone and cannot have thing their way.

Thing is they think that things will be all great but they seem to forget the ripples that they cause by saying all these horrible things....and I am supposed to support them and smile and play happy families?

Not fucking likely....I'd rather risk things looking like it is all me me me and be the evil cunt they portray me to be...and if they hate me for it I'm not going to lose any sleep over it.

Oh, and before I forget...to whomever was kind enough to relay the previous messages about them on Facebook and Twitter...thankyou, I didn't have their phone numbers so was unable to tell them not to contact me again.

May be a little quiet

I am not sure if I'll be around much, things just seem to be going to hell in a handbag.

Sorry.

How rude can people be?

Yes, I know...it was never going to last...I had to complain about something!!

I was in town yesterday and I almost got barged into a stand full of video games by this guy walking passed...why?  Simple, it was because he was too interested in looking at his smartphone to take any notice of what was going on around him.

This is nothing exactly new, this has been happening for a while...people will be too busy using their phones instead of taking notice of what is going on around them, I remember a commercial based on a teen recording a video on their phone and getting run over because they were not looking where they were going...quite powerful stuff, and sadly something that happened all too often.

Then recently there was a new commercial where people were so interested in their shiny new phone they were walking into people, and being generally ignorant on the whole....yeah, like people need encouraging (and yes before you point it out to me it is supposed to be a joke, I am fully aware of that).

Even Haunted Rockcake does this, and it really annoys me...for example she will stand in the middle of a slim aisle, and read a message on her Blackberry blocking the gangway for everyone else (I must stress now, she is not a fat person before anyone conjures up that kind of image!!) despite the fact it is something she constantly moans about happening when people do it to her.

I have an iPhone, I take it with me everywhere, but if I am going to answer a message I make sure I am either sat down on a bench or seat of some sort or out of people's way...it's not rocket science, and it is just courtesy.

Perhaps my mom brought me up the wrong way....

I Think I Found My Smile!

Yes go on, make the jokes...it was down the back of the sofa!

You may well want to mark this date down in the calendar too, you see this entry in FBM is not any kind of rant or moan!

Things are changing here at Yam Towers...for the better too. Mentally there is a far brighter outlook, I am feeling a lot more positive about myself, my confidence and self esteem have boosted by tenfold..no a thousandfold and I catch myself smiling so much all the time, I just so very happy all the time!

People around me are noticing the difference in me too...saying that I carry myself totally different, I interact with people more, with enthusiasm too. I still feel a bit nervous and panicky about being around people but it feels more that if they stare at me it's their problem and not mine.

Sure, being on antidepressants has been a help making things feel better, but I have also lost weight and in just under a year I have lost over 10" on my waistline which has been great as weight has been a great issue for me for a long time.

I have had a great support network of really nice people who have been there for me despite being a miserable git a lot. I'm not going to name names but there was one person in particular who helped me more than they will ever realise, they made me realise that I am worth something, that I'm not a piece of scum like I felt I was. Well, you know who you are...and if you read this blog entry (I hope you do) I thank you from the very bottom of my heart for saving me from the freefall I was in mentally, I owe you a drink!

So yeah...good times ahead, maybe even slimmer times, but the future's bright...for once.

AVOID AVG

There was once a time that I'd do nothing but sing the praises of AVG, I loved the free version and recommended it to people all the time, it was a great defence for the PC.

It looks like those days are gone.

Today I went to install AVG Free 2011 on my mom's PC and it was the biggest mistake that I have ever made in my entire life.

Well it installed ok, or so I thought, when despite it saying that it installed OK that the system was unprotected and had an invalid licence code (I checked their knowledge base they have no advice for this issue despite people having this problem). No matter what I did I got the same problems, so the only thing I could do next was uninstall this and find something else to replace it

AVG had other ideas.

Despite using a administrator account AVG was adamant that I did not have sufficient account access, and therefore couldn't remove it, which in turn means that no other antiviral software could be used on it...frustrating to say the least.

I decided to have a look on the AVG support forums, and lots of people are having serious issues with systems being screwed up by AVG Free 2011.

I'm frankly quite disappointed, they used to be so good, like I said at the beginning of this blog, I'd tell everyone to download and use it....now I suggest you avoid like the plague.

Incidentally, you need a piece of software specific to remove AVG 2011, and the link below is a direct link for the software to help you and instructions:
http://www.avg.com/filedir/util/support/avg2011remover_en.exe
I put the link here as it was pretty much buried in the forums, look in the knowledge base was pretty much useless....AVG Technologies, I'm really disappointed in you.

Good people out there, if you value your PC....DO NOT DOWNLOAD AVG 2011!!! Mom's system is now currently running avast! Antivirus and is working well.

I'm just this guy...

A lot of people seem to get annoyed when I say to people "I'm just this guy" and although a few people know why I say I thought I'd try and explain why I say this.

I've always been a big fan of The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy by the amazing and sadly missed Douglas Adams, and own the books, radio series, TV series, comics and movie (I own it as it is part of my collection, but the movie is not that good..) and back in the 90s it was listening to the radio series that kinda kept me going when I thought I was losing it...and I got the nickname Zaphod after signing a Christmas card to a friend "Phil"!  (The odd thing about the Christmas card it that no matter how much these people mention this card I do not actually remember writing this card ever!!)

OK, kinda time to explain a little more...Zaphod is one of the main characters of the Hitchhiker's series, he is a disgraced former intergalactic President (who when visited Earth used the pseudonym Phil) who steals a spaceship and goes on the run.  Zaphod says he is the greatest guy in the entire Universe and beyond and is so full of himself it is unreal (something that is not me!!  I'd be totally devastated if anyone considered me full of myself in any way, it's not the person I see myself as) and every so often when there is a news report about Zaphod in the series they tend to ask his personal brain-care specialist Gag Halfront and he always finishes by saying "well...Zaphod's just this guy y'know?"

Just this guy...that's me.  I'm nobody special, and once run away from everything just to be a mere face in the crowd.  I'm not trying to put myself when I say this...but I am just a guy who does this and that, no one in particular and really don't like it when people try and make me out to be something special (I know that people are just trying to be nice, but when people say about me on Twitter that I'm this great great it makes me shudder somewhat...I just don't see what they are going on about.) because I'm not the kind of guy who wants to be in the spotlight in that respect.

So yeah...I'm just this guy.

Primark, Larger Sizes Required!

I went into town today to do some general shopping and decided to go into my local Primark to see if I was able to pick up some clothing in my size, as they sometimes do T-shirts in my size.
I was able to find a few designs in XXL but they were generic designs they had some really cool retro designs that were available but they were all too small, as were all the sweatshirts, shirts, jeans and pretty much everything else.
Primark, if you can do some generic T-shirts in XXL then why can't you do other things in larger sizes? Not everyone is a bloody beanpole you know, and despite what a lot of people think of outsized individuals it sometimes cannot be helped.
Sure, I can order clothes online(and for the most part I have to) but I like to be able to look and hold the item I want to buy!
I'd love to see Primark give a reason for the sizes on this blog, but I doubt they would even bother, but they really need to start introducing more clothing in their stores in larger sizes.
Anyone reading this, care to comment on this?

Lord Likely's Audio Adventure

I look outside and I see that it's another dreary rainy day...great for me as I love it, but there are some of you out there, so I thought that this might be of interest for some of you, and audio adventure to listen to!


For those who do not know who Lord Likely is a funny character who is quite the ladies man, and his astonishing adventures can be found on his website which are really entertaining read!


And now, there is an audio adventure for fans to listen to!  Part 1 of  ‘The Filching Fog of Finsbury Park' is up on the website now, and can be downloaded directly from the website..


The year is 1890, and a spate of muggings has hit London town. But these are no ordinary muggings, for the victims swear that they were actually mugged by...the fog itself!

Can it be true? Has London's fog taken to robbing the citizens? Only one man can solve this mystery, but sadly Sherlock Holmes is unavailable. Instead, it is up to drunken, lecherous aristocrat Lord Likely to attempt to save the day...

I've had a listen and I love it and cannot wait for the second part (out Monday) so have a listen and enjoy! 

Live in UK and want US Snacks and Sodas?

You do?  Me too!  I love Mountain Dew but the UK version that is now available is pretty much rubbish, and they only have one flavour too (I really like Code Red!!) so I have been looking around for a good place to get my soda fix...

I have found a really good place where I can order various American soda, snacks and groceries (including my favourites Mountain Dew, Cheetos and Oreos!!) and if you order them by 1500GMT you can get the delivery sent to you the next day...how cool is that??

They have all sorts of American things there...sodas, powdered drinks, cereals, pie fillings, and even ziploc bags!

So head on over to American Soda and fill yer boots...check out their website on http://www.americansoda.co.uk and also follow them on Twitter or Facebook....you can also call them up on +44 (0) 161 359 3655 or email them on info@americansoda.co.uk...trust me, you won't regret being a customer and you will go back for more!!!

Oh, and here is a picture of my latest order from them, thanks to them I have my Dew fix and all is right with the World...until I need to get a bus!!

Dieting Ladies, Please Read...

Ladies, I know many of you out there who are constantly on a diet, whether you actually need to be or not.  I thought that the following image might be something you need to see...

Ladies (and even gentlemen who feel they are constantly needing to lose weight, there are some out there!!) remember no matter what your weight/size, you are loved..

The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test

Well, I took this test and got the following result...

Your result for The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test ...

Outcast Genius

52 % Nerd, 91% Geek, 74% Dork

For The Record:
A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in all three, earning you the title of: Outcast Genius.
Outcast geniuses usually are bright enough to understand what society wants of them, and they just don't care! They are highly intelligent and passionate about the things they know are *truly* important in the world. Typically, this does not include sports, cars or make-up, but it can on occassion (and if it does then they know more than all of their friends combined in that subject).
Outcast geniuses can be very lonely, due to their being outcast from most normal groups and too smart for the room among many other types of dorks and geeks, but they can also be the types to eventually rule the world, ala Bill Gates, the prototypical Outcast Genius. 

So there you go folks, I am apparently an outcast genius, and in theory Bill Gates should be my idol!!  Somehow I just don't think this is me (yes, I know these quizzes are just a bit of fun before you say it!!) but I'm sure many of you would beg to differ on that!!

If you want to try the test youself CLICK HERE and let me know what your results are!!

What Is My Passion?

I feel a touch daft...

I was asked recently by a good friend "what is my passion?" and even thinking about it now, it is a question that I am unable to answer...there are things, I like...there are things that I have great enthusiasm for, but what exaclty do I have a passion for?

I used to have a passion for The Turds, I put my heart and soul into the brand, but it didn't exactly end great, I still have most of my collection too...but I look at then and think they are cool, but that's about it really..

I like listening to movies, like watching Horror movies, collected a few animated movies and shows, I am a fan of Batman and several other comic books, have a keen interest in technology, I listen to a lot of different music, collect Transformers toys, and have the radio series/tv series/movies/books of The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy....but because I like them, does that make them my passion?

What are your thoughts...what is my passion?